I had a very beautiful session with a client today that made me reflect on just how practical Love can be, and how it has a tendency to show up in the most unlikely ways and places. The reason why she had called me was that she – let’s call her Clare – and her husband were facing a very difficult situation: their son is having a hard time at school and acting out a lot, and they were considering pulling him out and have him home-schooled. She wanted to get clearer on her feelings about all of this before coming to a decision.
Very quickly during and after she described the situation to me, it came to me to ask whether she had spoken to the teacher. When clients share situations with me, I listen at that level, but I am also always open to the expression of Love. When I asked the question, I had no idea where it would lead, but I trusted the fact that it kept coming. It turns out that it may hold the key to a healing embrace and movement in and with this situation, rather than the disconnecting that they had been thinking of.
Very quickly during and after she described the situation to me, it came to me to ask whether she had spoken to the teacher. When clients share situations with me, I listen at that level, but I am also always open to the expression of Love. When I asked the question, I had no idea where it would lead, but I trusted the fact that it kept coming. It turns out that it may hold the key to a healing embrace and movement in and with this situation, rather than the disconnecting that they had been thinking of.
Clare shared with me all the reasons why she hadn’t even thought of approaching the teacher. As we were looking at that possibility, it became very obvious that this was an option that was worth exploring and that could indeed hold the key to the situation turning around for all concerned: the parents who were worried, the son who was stressed and in pain, as well as the teacher and the school. To me, the energy of Love and unity was very palpable as we were considering all of this.
Just to be clear: sometimes the loving choice is indeed to walk away, to let go, to pull out. But when we open to a difficult situation with a willingness to embrace all of the emotions that are there about it, all the projections and beliefs about others involved, and all the fears about what’s going to happen – embrace without believing they are ultimately true – then Love will reveal itself. Invariably, the loving choice will feel uncomfortable, vulnerable and risky. But it will also have a creative, healing, and deeply truthful and loving energy to it. It takes us back into the open heart, into being open to the possibility that even this situation is an expression of Love and can be trusted in having arisen and in where it leads us, and others, to.
When Clare did speak with the teacher, it was a deeply meaningful and love-filled exchange that threw up some very surprising new vistas. We never know how a situation will unfold. Nobody knows until it starts shifting and moving, and even then the outcome is unknown. But I do know that the loving choice usually becomes very clear, and it is confirmed by the fact that it takes us back home to Love and the unity with all of Life. It is most definitely not what our conditioning, feelings, beliefs and thoughts would have us do, as they are based on the assumption of separation: being separate from Life and from others. And it’s usually not enough to simply ‘denounce’ this conditioning as egoic. Somehow, there needs to be a true and loving embrace, and a healing intention for it to come back home, too, before it will truly let go of its grip on us. Only then are we free to act from Love and as Love, one situation, one choice, one step at a time. And then Love will flower in the most unlikely places and bear the sweetest fruit of knowing ourselves to be One with the ever-so-mysterious unfolding of Life.
Just to be clear: sometimes the loving choice is indeed to walk away, to let go, to pull out. But when we open to a difficult situation with a willingness to embrace all of the emotions that are there about it, all the projections and beliefs about others involved, and all the fears about what’s going to happen – embrace without believing they are ultimately true – then Love will reveal itself. Invariably, the loving choice will feel uncomfortable, vulnerable and risky. But it will also have a creative, healing, and deeply truthful and loving energy to it. It takes us back into the open heart, into being open to the possibility that even this situation is an expression of Love and can be trusted in having arisen and in where it leads us, and others, to.
When Clare did speak with the teacher, it was a deeply meaningful and love-filled exchange that threw up some very surprising new vistas. We never know how a situation will unfold. Nobody knows until it starts shifting and moving, and even then the outcome is unknown. But I do know that the loving choice usually becomes very clear, and it is confirmed by the fact that it takes us back home to Love and the unity with all of Life. It is most definitely not what our conditioning, feelings, beliefs and thoughts would have us do, as they are based on the assumption of separation: being separate from Life and from others. And it’s usually not enough to simply ‘denounce’ this conditioning as egoic. Somehow, there needs to be a true and loving embrace, and a healing intention for it to come back home, too, before it will truly let go of its grip on us. Only then are we free to act from Love and as Love, one situation, one choice, one step at a time. And then Love will flower in the most unlikely places and bear the sweetest fruit of knowing ourselves to be One with the ever-so-mysterious unfolding of Life.
PS: Update on this blog from May 2015:
Clare's son is now thriving with being schooled at home.
Here is a doodle of his that Clare sent me.
Happy heart ending!
Clare's son is now thriving with being schooled at home.
Here is a doodle of his that Clare sent me.
Happy heart ending!
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